Gritty Under Police Investigation for Punching a 13 Year Old Child


What a story breaking today with the Philadelphia Inquirer:

 

 

Here are some excerpts from the investigation and yes, they are laugh out loud ridiculous:

 

After the alleged punch, Greenwell emailed officials at Comcast Spectacor, first complaining of the “lousy picture” with the mascot who didn’t look at the camera. Then he raised the “more serious and disappointing” concern.

You have to love that the dad first complained about the shitty picture before he complained about his child being punched by a grown man wearing an orange costume.

 

Greenwell said he took his son to see a chiropractor about a week after the incident. The chiropractor noted that Brandon suffered from mild pain, and diagnosed him with a back bruise, or a “contusion to lower thoracic spine with subluxation,” according to documents from the chiropractor, provided by Greenwell.

 

THERE’S THAT GOD DAMN WORD AGAIN. “Thoracic”. Nobody with thoracic issues is getting special treatment in this city ever again. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, strike three.

 

For the Flyers, the Nov. 19 photo shoot was a chance to reward their loyal fans who pay thousands of dollars a year to support a team that hasn’t won a playoff series since 2012. For Greenwell, it was an opportunity for his son to meet Gritty, who was introduced in 2018 and described by the Flyers as someone with “bully” tendencies.

Alright, that’s just an unnecessary shot at the Flyers. Come on man! Big win over the Penguins last night!

 

Comcast Spectacor did not return a request for comment. Efforts to reach Gritty were unsuccessful as of Wednesday afternoon.

Yeah, you lemme know if you are able to get a comment from a giant orange creature. Who doesn’t have an address or contact info. Because it doesn’t exist.

 

We here at PhillyFanLife.com are willing to help out with any of Gritty’s legal issues. Anyone who buys our Gritty shirt, 100% of the proceeds will go directly towards Gritty’s bail money.

https://dsgntree.com/phillyfanlife/gritty-tee

(I’ve been legally advised to let readers know we will not actually be paying Gritty’s legal fees and I will be keeping your money).

 

By Aidan Powers | January 22, 2020
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