Everybody on the Eagles Roster Got Injured Last Night

Last night was just a total bloodletting for the Birds. Everybody and their mom was in the blue tent getting checked out. It felt like half of the offense was out of the equation before Collinsworth could even slide in to screen on his computer chair. Desean And Alshon we’re both out early along with Dallas Goedert, who was beaten up coming into the game. Zach Ertz even came out for a play leaving us without our top two WRs and TEs at one point. Nelson Agholor, before breaking our collective hearts, was taken into the back for concussion protocol. An entire high flying receiving offense shot down. It’s alright though, we’re still solid everywhere else on the field right?….

Jason Peters goes down and has to come off the field, Corey Clement fumbles the ball because he injured his shoulder, Timmy Jernigan was put in a walking boot during halftime, Jason Kelce took a trip to the ever popular injury tent…

I’m surprised a bird didn’t just shit on Doug Pederson’s visor last night because it felt like everything bad that could’ve happened to us, happened. Even the prodigal son, the golden boy Carson Wentz wasn’t immune to the hit parade Atlanta put on. They did everything but shoot Wentz last night and even if they did, he probably could’ve gotten the ball off for 8 yards. He played like star in a high school football movie but still had to come out for a string of plays in the first half (which gave us the electric factory that is Josh “Lightning” McCown, who went 4 for 4 because he’s still got it).

Can’t sugarcoat it, on paper this does not look well. We are limping out of the gate to start the year. But we only lost by mere inches of a first down to a good football team with the JV skill players in, so it could be worse. As for now we just have to dance with the people we brought here. We roll with the guys we have and we’re on to Detroit.

INJURY UPDATES: Doug said that if the game was a “must-win”, he believed that Desean, Alshon and Dallas Goedert could’ve played. John Clarke is reporting that Desean is aiming to play Sunday versus the Lions. Tim Jernigan is out 4-6 weeks with a broken foot. Mike Florio originally said Big Timmy could be out for the year, so I guess this is good news(?)